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A recently promoted lady announced that she should be addressed as 'boss' and not as 'madam'. I said, "Madam" is more respectful than "boss". "Why is that?" she shouted. "You see, if you spell madam backwards you still get 'madam', whereas, if you spell 'boss' backwards, you get 'double S O B.' "Please
maa’m, don't sob!, I mean 'cry'. You just got promoted!" James
Fernandes. USA Ek sher ki shaadi thi....To uski baarat main ek Chuha bohat jam ke nach raha tha. Public ka to funda hillgaya. Boss yeh Chuhe ko sher ki shaadi main itna kya maja aa raha hai. Ek Bandar ne Chuhe se pucha. "abey item, itna kyon naach riya hai? Chuha bola.. "aaj
mere bhai ki shaadi hai, nachoo kyon nahin". Bandar
bola "Sher aur tera bhai - abey bheja khisak gayela hai kya tera!!"
Chuha
bola "Haan..... main bhi shaadi ke pehle SHER tha........." A
woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an afterwork cocktail with her
girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome, and extremely sexy
young man entered. He was so striking that the woman could not take her
eyes off him... The
Young man noticed her overly "attentive" stare, and walked
directly over to her.Before she could offer her apologies for so rudely
staring, he leaned over and whispered to her, "I'll do anything,
absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for
$20-- on one condition." Flabbergasted,
the woman asked what the condition was. The young man replied, "You
have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words." The
woman considered his proposition for a moment, then slowly removed from
her purse a $20 bill, which she pressed into the young man's hand, along
with her address. She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly,
meaningfully said... "CLEAN
MY HOUSE." At
a bus stop, 2 Italian men get in the bus. They sit down and engage
in an animated conversation. The
lady sitting behind them ignores them at first. But her attention
is galvanizingly drawn when she hears one of the men say the following : "Emma
come first, den i come, den two asses come
together. i come once -a- more. then two asses,
they come together again. i come again and pee twice,
then i come one lasta time" "You
foul mouthed sex maniac swine" retorted the lady indelegently,
"in this country....we don't speak aloud in public places about our
sex lives". "Hey,
coola down lady" said the man. "who is talking about
sexa ? I'm just telling my frienda how to spell "mississippi" Maurice
D’ Mello Colorful
Language Have
you ever tried to summarise, what happened in a few words for insurance
forms? The following are true statements taken from the forms and
printed in the Toronto news. Coming
home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don’t
have. The
other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention. I
thought my window was down but found it was up when 'I put my hand
through it. I
collided with a stationary truck coming the other way. A
truck backed through my windshield into my wife’s face. A
pedestrian hit me and went under my car. The
car was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I
hit him. I
pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and
headed over the embankment. In
my attempt to kill a fly I drove into a telephone pole. I
was shopping for plants all day and was on my way home . As I reached an
intersection a hedge sprung up obscuring
my vision. I did not see the other car. I
had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had
the accident. I
was on my way to the doctors with rear end trouble when
my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident. To
avoid hitting the bumper-bar of the parked car in front, I hit the
pedestrian. My
car was legally parked as I backed into the other vehicle. An
invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle and vanished. I
told the police I was not injured but in removing my hat I found that I
had a fractured skull. I
was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the
road when I struck him. The
pedestrian had no idea which way to run, so I ran him over. I
saw the slow moving old faced gentleman as he bounced off the hood of
the car. I
was thrown from my car as it lost the road. It was found in a ditch by
some cows. The
telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of the
way when it struck the front end of my car. I
was unable to stop in time and my car crashed into the other vehicle.
The driver and passenger then left immediately for vacation with
injuries. Kishoo For More of Barkur Masala Click |
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Barkur, located in Udupi Taluk, Karnataka, India. 576 210 |
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Copyright Kishoo, Barkur 2002. |
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